


LEWIS HAMILTON | 5x F1 WDC Winner | Beyond Victory

by raikkonen (armario)



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Fluff and Angst, Gen, M/M, Nico's YT channel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-23
Updated: 2019-07-23
Packaged: 2020-07-12 04:16:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19940068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/armario/pseuds/raikkonen
Summary: Lewis had taken Nico's offer to go on his YouTube channel with a pinch of salt, bearing in mind it was sent via text at around 2am with two spelling mistakes, and it was on the same vein as asking if Lewis had ever seen a pig flying across a blue moon.





	LEWIS HAMILTON | 5x F1 WDC Winner | Beyond Victory

**Author's Note:**

> my first RPF fic... I have really sinned here. Anyway, this needs to actually happen. Someday.

Lewis had taken Nico's offer to go on his YouTube channel with a pinch of salt, bearing in mind it was sent via text at around 2am with two spelling mistakes, and it was on the same vein as asking if Lewis had ever seen a pig flying across a blue moon.

However, the next day, he'd messaged again, and said, _"I really mean it. Only if you want, though._  
That had pissed Lewis off a little, because when Nico said "only if you want", he was really saying, "I'll be really hurt if you don't." It wasn't much of a choice.  
Lewis thought long and hard. _Did_ he want to? He sighed. The answer, without question, was no. But he could never stay away from Nico. And over the past couple of years, his anger, and hopefully Nico's, had died down a bit.

 _Ok._ He texted back, trying to ignore the feelings of trepidation, simultaneously hoping and despairing that Nico might be put off by his unenthusiastic tone.

_Great! :-) next Friday at my studio 5:00pm? X_

Okay, scratch that then.

_Sure._

Lewis forwent the 'x' because he was pretty sure it was a mistake; a force of habit. Anything else was enough to make him feel faintly sick. With nostalgia.

He put the interview out of his mind so he could focus on the race, winning at Silverstone was extremely important.  
And he did win. It was a great race and a wonderful feeling to get the home win with all the British fans cheering him on. He knew Nico was around somewhere interviewing his dad and brother, but he didn't think he could face the German right now. He didn't want anything to spoil his victory, make it bittersweet or throw him off course.

The two week gap between the British and German Grands Prix gave him some time to relax. His attention turned to the interview with Nico.  
He was familiar with what would be expected of him. Lewis had watched the channel's celebrity interviews, some of them going on for almost an hour and a half.  
It would be that he and Nico would struggle for a few minutes' worth of amicable footage, or Nico would have to sift through several hours of companionable reminiscing. Lewis didn't know which. He still didn't know how to react to the fact that Nico's YouTube channel had a lot of content with the word 'Lewis in the title. Although- it didn't feel like a taunt, or some kind of similar mind game. Yet nor was Nico being genuinely random with the topics of his videos; it was not a coincidence that Lewis was often a focus. Perhaps he was trying to make amends and show his support in the most innocuous, subliminal way possible.

Either way, the days went by in a blur- the more he wanted time to slow down so he could relax and enjoy a short break, the more it sped up until it was time to get back to work. 

He left for the studio (Nico had sent him directions) at 4:36, probably cutting it fine. Secretly, he didn't want to seem too eager, but didn't want to let Nico down either. He cursed himself for overthinking it all, but he still felt reasonably calm. It was only upon arriving and sitting down in the lobby did the nerves really kick in.

What the hell was he thinking? 

They were barely on speaking terms. Sometimes, reality was suspended just for a few sweet moments when they ran into each other at a gala or press conference. Other times, Lewis got blackout drunk, temporarily forgetting he wasn't supposed to drink, checked his call history, and saw that he'd left Nico 12 messages or something. The fucking prick never replied either, probably doing Lewis a favour because he knew those voicemails had to be real scandal material.

The point was, there was nothing normal about their relationship. Not anymore. And Lewis had agreed to provide his 'worst enemy' with an interview fit for broadcast, with no crying, swearing, screaming, pleading, kissing, fucking, or passive-aggressive sniping.

He looked around the room, trying to focus on the pictures lining the walls, strained his ears to pick up what was being said in the next room over, behind a closed door, so he had something to distract himself with. It wasn't working. Doubts poured into his mind- _what if we start arguing straight away? What if Nico says something and I get annoyed and it devolves into a huge row? What if I randomly start crying because I miss him so much and he's like, what the fuck, Lewis, everything ok? No, far from it. Or I get the urge to punch his smug face in and it's just overwhelming being anywhere near him?_

Lewis struggled to catch his breath. His heartbeat was through the roof. Looking at his watch, he saw it was almost time for the interview. He bit his lip, trying to calm himself down, count to 100, take deep breaths and close his eyes. What if, what if, what if. 

The door to one of the rooms opened. Nico was standing there, Lewis didn't need to look up to know that. So he didn't; he couldn't.

"Lewis?"

He sounded concerned. Haha. Right then and there, Lewis nearly punched the wall, because he _still_ reacted to Nico saying his name. He rubbed his eyes, still hyperventilating. The sofa dipped beside him. A moment, and Nico's hesitant hand was on his shoulder. That set Lewis off even more because time was, they couldn't keep their hands off each other. Now Nico treated him like a bomb about to explode.

"I'm so glad you're here," Nico said softly.

"I'm sorry man I just," Lewis tried to school his features back into calm confidence. "Fuck."

"We don't have to do the interview."

"Yeah I want to do it, I... I just don't want to fuck things up even more," he gritted out, clasping his hands together as though it will stop them trembling. 

Nico rubbed his back soothingly. "Just breathe, okay?"

Memories, again. Lewis winced.

"Ah, Lewis. You know I am sorry, right? You know that?"

Yes, deep down, he did know. And he was sorry too, in a kind of desperate, pleading, where-did-it-all-go-wrong kind of way. But Lewis wasn't stupid, he knew that they couldn't come back from this and return to normal. Not after the unspeakable things they had said to each other. Although... after so many years of bitter fighting, he has this tiny hope that they can have something new, something different.

He let himself get his breath back, try and control his heartbeat a little better. Reassuring himself that everything would be fine, that the hundreds of hours he and Nico had spent chatting as best friends would make it easy to answer some questions for just one.

Lewis sighed. "Let's just do the interview." 

He looked at Nico then. Really _looked,_ for maybe the first time in many years. There was no trace of hatred, no glint of rivalry or resentment in his familiar eyes. Eyes that Lewis has never stopped searching out. It was like salvation and Lewis buried his head in Nico's shoulder so he didn't have to see that expression anymore. 

Nico's arms circled around his waist and he tucked his chin atop Lewis' head, holding him close. Lewis realised that Nico would do this for as long as he needed and he felt some overwhelming affection wash away a little more of his bitter hurt.

"What are we, hm?" Nico whispered. 

Lewis pulled back, wiped his eyes. "Fucking hell," he croaked. Then, rueful, "I guess that had to be done."

Nico snorted. "It absolutely did. Now... come on, I spent hours coming up with these questions. You will like them. And I got your favourite snacks as well."

He took a deep breath and followed Nico into the recording room.

*

Three days later, the video is uploaded to YouTube. Nico doesn't mention that the 'interview' lasted for another three hours, or that they went for drinks after, or that some of the footage was too profound, too personal, to make the cut, and those parts he edits and keeps for himself.

Still, it ends up in the top 10 trending. 


End file.
